Too close

I watched "The Vow" tonight. Holy moly I about cried like at least three times during the movie. How can someone love someone so much to try to win back her love by starting from scratch? Having known this woman and loved her and know that a TBI caused permanent memory loss. Leaving him out of her world. :( Needless to say I totally wanted Channing tatum to win! :) He's totally hottie husband-(listening to lionel ritchie's: all night long)-while-doing-the-dirty-twice-before-bed-and-then-again-before-work-worthy. You see his abs in this movie... its PG 13 people. Come on.

Wow, I said it. I haven't written in a while. Too much to do. I guess. I keep having mixed thoughts about decisions in my life. Down to what I am going to eat for dinner... But on a good note: Things are looking up up. I may be broke but school starts next week and that means I will have my head in books and homework. So that should keep me occupied. Secondly, I have been taking pics more and more. I love making art out of beauty. Thirdly, I still want to get the third generation white iPad so I can take my homework wherever I go. And also use it to look at pics as I take them for clients with the camera adapter. How cool is that?!?!? Just need me some money. But I really need more is a Canon wide angle lens for the wedding I am doing at the end of June. Super excited about that. Its not hard to take a good pic (with skills)... if the subjects are already pretty. But its technically not my first wedding... and not my last this summer either. Kinda psyched about that. Lots of things happening yay! Plus I am still waiting on mr charming to get his crap together and make my life complete! hahaha! I am getting tired of the whole live-for-myself routine. Puma and I are ready to move forward. Maybe. I am not sure what my future holds but my universe keeps telling me to stay positive about it all. So I will. Patiently. Until I can't. I deserve the world. I do. And I am trying to tell myself that everyday. I offer it so why shouldn't I ask for it in return?!?

This song is about a boy who is torn.
  
Doesn't this song make you want to smack him? He has obviously fallen out of love with this girl but has no guts to tell her. He knows she needs and deserves love, love he can not give her. Even though he made promises that he broke. But he is too close and doesn't want to hurt her so what does he do? Stay and live a lie? Or Say and hurt her but be honest? PLUS I love the dubstep choruses in the song. OOOOOOHHHHH love me some good dubstep. Slow, wahahawahawaahwahawa big base. Drags the emotion out of your insides.

So on that note... are relationships really worth the hurt and pain? Are friendships? When you have to admit that they are over and you both have changed. Things are different and you can keep pretending or admit defeat. 'Hide no more"  and I feel that I am lonely either way. I just need to go out and make new friends. With similar interests. Similar hobbies and talents and such. My problem is I usually make guy friends a whole lot easier. You interpret how you will.
As for now, I must sleep. I have a big day ahead of me.